As the summer winds down, parents everywhere are preparing for the inevitable return to school. The start of a new school year can be exciting and stressful for both children and their families. I am a working mother of five rambunctious, yet good-hearted children and our house is busy and quite chaotic most of the time.
Let’s face it, when you take into consideration house-hold chores, meal planning, grocery shopping and add on the additional responsibilities of back-to-school preparations, and establishing morning and afternoon routines that meet everyone’s needs, the new school year is both stressful and scary.
I am often asked “How do you handle having five kids and remain sane?” Usually, I just smile and say something along the line of “I take it day by day.” That is not the exact truth, however. Here are some of the ways I have learned to cope with the stress of the school year.
1. Open Communication: I have learned that when my kids are feeling anxious or have reservations about the new school year, they can make the process of preparing for it ten times harder. I’ve learned to step back and encourage my children to talk to me. I try to listen attentively and acknowledge how they feel. Likewise, I do the same. I might tell my 7-year-old who doesn’t want to try on the pants in her dresser drawer that I’m feeling stressed because I don’t know what clothes she needs for school. Maybe once she realizes how her actions are affecting the way I feel she will be more willing to get the chore done. My hope is for my children to develop good communication skills that will carry over into adulthood.
2. Establish A Routine: Creating a structured daily routine for mornings, homework, mealtimes, and sleep is vital to surviving as a parent. I believe it provides a sense of stability and can reduce anxiety.
3. Encourage Self-Care: I view self-care as engaging in an activity you enjoy. This could be in the form of exercise or a hobby. It can also be time set aside to simply chill on the couch.
4. Manage Time Effectively: I have a planner that goes everywhere with me. I use it to keep myself on track at both work and home. Breaking tasks into smaller, manageable chunks helps me to prevent feeling overwhelmed. I also try to keep my expectations realistic and try not to cram more into a day that I can reasonably achieve. Having more than one or two items left on my list at night tends to have a discouraging effect.
5. Prepare In Advance: I use all kinds of lists to outline our family goals. I have shopping lists, to-do lists, wish lists, family activity lists, you name it, I’ve probably listed it. This is the only way I know how to ensure that everyone has what they need when they need it. Beyond lists, I cannot stress enough the importance of organizing school supplies, planning outfits, and locating shoes the night before a school day. I also appreciate a good color-coding system or labeling system, so I know what personal items belong to whom. I keep a travel bag ready to go with extra clothes for the younger kids, diapers, wipes and other necessities and replace items as they are used.
I understand that all families are different, and what works for one may not work for all. I truly hope that you find something helpful here but, if nothing else, take away a sense of peace knowing that as a parent doing your best, you are enough.
